Tuesday, April 30, 2013
Springtime Witchcraft
The hue from the full moon fractures
Through the window, rays splayed
In the shape of a once whole face.
Followed by the damp Montanan orchestra,
Breezy half-step birdsong and howling riffs.
Individual calls seek recognition,
In the fragmented yet coagulated noise
Pollution-- like our idiosyncratic song.
Stacked in a pyramid
Whose foundation pines apex
And pinnacle seeks base.
We are an ecosystem of contradictions.
And while the rays make their ways
Across the floor, highlighting unused acrylics
And virgin novels, abandoned relics
Of a blossomed yesteryear echo
Poignant tunes-- as if walls were strings
On a piano whose pedal won't lift.
The sheets still have that rhythm.
It is written in the ever-so-salty-stains--
A major chord we believe. Step down
One minor third to read the trail of clothing
Removed ever so gently in syncopated
Zephyrs between two chests.
To faces in half-finished paintings
Who sang backup for the recurring ode
To springtime witchcraft--
Where the songs of wolves and birds
Are indistinguishable amidst the beat
Of trepidatious hearts.
Wednesday, April 24, 2013
Lessons for Practice-- Re: Haiti After the Earthquake
The
further I get in my education, the more I realize that learning is a
never-ending process. A salient lesson I have encountered in my last semester of
college has taken place in a final reflective sweep of my education at the
University of Montana. I have recognized that any subject of any discipline can
be viewed as the interaction of interdependent and cyclical forces. It is with
this perspective that I approach Paul Farmer’s book, Haiti After the Earthquake (2011), in an attempt to siphon out
lessons for practice in international social work from Farmer’s medical jargon
and clinical mindset. Farmer’s account of pre and post-earthquake Haiti
illustrates an exemplary case study for many issues of social work; in this
essay I will focus on lessons of ‘acute-on-chronic,’ local expertise,
transformation of worldviews, and assuaging the unremitting contradictions of
humanitarian being.
Paul
Farmer eloquently weaves top-tier and on-the-ground perspectives through a
handful of coined phrases, my favorite being ‘acute-on-chronic.’ As a medical
professional, he reminds us that immediate illnesses and social ills alike must
be viewed in terms of the chronic history of symptoms and infrastructural
fragility facilitating the onset of struggle. With this, Farmer reminds us to
always contextualize the present issue with knowledge of history, systemic
injustice, generational trauma, and other contributions to the social mélange.
In essence, Farmer reminds practitioners to confront problems with a holistic
lens—to account for the delicate ecological nature of social ills and not
attribute blame to any one cause or propone any one solution.
The
idea of ‘acute-on-chronic’ segues into Farmer’s dialogue about the importance
of language in our conceptualizations of practice. Through language, ‘experts’
construct certain realities. Farmer uses the example of the use of ‘natural disaster’ to describe the
earthquake in Haiti. He claims that the disaster in Haiti was in no way
‘natural,’ but was a social disaster resulting from, “policy decision[s] made
far from the…affected areas,” (213). Farmer challenges the reader to recognize
who is present at the table when big decisions or definitions are made; we
should always question the agenda at hand, examining who is benefiting from the
policy prescriptions. Furthermore we should identify whose perspectives are
missing from the equation and “[seek] to echo and amplify the voices of those
we encountered as well as those silenced,” (2).
As
Farmer stresses in the aforementioned quote, and to continue with the role of
language in social work practice, I am learning that it is essential to let
those affected define their experiences, problem, and solutions. It is
necessary to vouch for the inclusion of locals into the decision-making and
implementation process. As Farmer quotes Hillary Clinton, “we cannot any longer
in the twenty-first century be making decisions for people and their futures
without listening and without giving them the opportunity to be as involved and
make as many decisions as possible,” (90).
The case study of Haiti honestly examines the role
of humanitarian aid in the development process. His account attests to the fact
that ingenuity and hard earned experiential knowledge should not be wasted on
top-down innovation and implementation, as this route often proves futile.
There is a vast potential of local expertise that often goes untapped. Our role
as social workers should be to crack the well—organize an efficient means of
fostering the flow.
Even
on an interpersonal level, I must practice letting go of a solution-driven
mindset and recognize when bearing witness is the deficient resource. As
well-to-do Americans, in the words of Farmer, “it’s tempting to focus on
immediate clinical questions,” (118) and facilitate the urge to ‘fix,’ as
opposed to recognizing the value of inaction. As a westerner I put a premium on
visible progress, but there are times when my agenda does not suit the present
situation and in fact can stifle change. I have to remember to let go of my way
of doing things and practice holding the uncomfortable space, allowing for a
humble exchange of knowledge and experience.
Farmer
speaks to the interplay of praxis and policy in one of his chapters; I can also
apply this to the conceptualization of opposing tensions within the self—that
social work is the interplay of action and reflection. As social workers, our
engagement with individuals or communities has reciprocal, and indeed
transformational, effects on our personal selves. It is essential to examine the
push/pull factors within our own selves in order to explore the motives behind
our participation in this work.
Taking
from Fetcher’s Professional is Personal, one
can recognize that our work is not passive. Social workers are racialized,
socialized, historicized creatures who cannot help the tides of sociopolitical
time nor check our worldviews at the door. Personally, I must be aware of the
deep-seated guilt that accompanies my status as a privileged white American. I
must also reconcile with the fact that people may only view me as a potential
dollar sign, temporarily invested in a project for self-centered gains. As
Isla asked recently in a class lecture, “how do we balance the responsibility of coming from a
country that has access to virtually all of the world’s resources,” and in
contrast practice being present with a humble spirit?
In
learning from Farmer, my classmates, and various voices from the readings over
the semester, I believe this is answered in the process. To paraphrase Rilke,
we must live the questions themselves. We must also learn to balance the
fundamental tensions between being, at all times, the learner and the teacher,
the researcher and the subject, the doctor and the patient, the sojourner and
the native. Likewise at the micro-level are macro-level tensions between
relating international experiences back to local issues in our home
communities. How can we transform the vision of globalization to facilitate
connections in terms of promoting social justice?
Social
work is a balancing act; we straddle incongruous paths, digging for a nugget of
change out of obstinate soil. Farmer’s book has reminded me to always remain a
humble learner, even if social norms label me ‘the expert.’ Every human’s
individual experience is incomprehensible, yet it is through the power of human
stories that I believe we can reconcile coming home to advocate the process of
reverse mission and accompaniment. In the end, as Farmer alludes to, we must
put our energy in drawing out people’s stories—look for shared patterns,
themes, to develop deeper discussion that probes into peoples’ experience so
that we can extract, expand, and humanize the struggles against injustice
abroad and at home.
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Inspirational 12's
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I have been facilitating support
groups for survivors of domestic violence at the YWCA for over a year now. Yet
after ever group, I come home buzzing with inspiration—I get high off the women's
resilience and gentle wisdom.
Tonight we were talking about
happiness as a general topic and they came up with some salient insights. We
started off by making a list of ‘commandments’ that we would like to live by in
order to increase our happiness/satisfaction in life. Here are some tidbits,
1.
show up
2.
be grateful
3.
be authentic
4.
relish the moments
5.
don’t be afraid to
be a few minutes early
6.
walk away before
trying to change others or change yourself for others
7.
enjoy the process
8.
identify the problem
9.
let it go
10.
do what ought to be
done
11.
act the way you want
to feel
12.
love,love,love
yourself
A moment of hope I experienced
when reading through these and hearing the women talk about their
‘commandments,’ was how happiness unearthed itself to me as a matter of choice.
As a group we reconciled with the fact that we have the power to rewrite our
energies into something beautiful or destructive—it is a matter of choosing the
light.
A second list we began to
generate were some ‘secrets to adulthood;’ in other words, what would you tell
yourself as an 80year old woman that you wish 20year old you would have known?
This is what came up:
1.
its okay to ask for
help-it doesn’t have to be a crisis. One woman said, “Asking for help is a gift
to your friends—it lets them know that you value their support.”
2.
Bring a
sweater—always be prepared and streamline your ‘tools’ for coping with a
situation so as to shortcut any unnecessary stress.
3.
People don’t notice
your mistakes as much as you think
4.
Do your
research—shop around before you make a big decision. Be it with tattoos,
relationships, schools, shoes, cars, big trips. Take your time and be patient
with your choices.
5.
Read the directions
6.
Embrace your inner
child
7.
Keep some chocolate
nearby
8.
Recognize the glory
of inaction
9.
Learn the value of
failure. Failure instigates growth—if we aren’t struggling to grow, we are
merely surviving. You have to push those boundaries and be willing to fail.
10.
Own your
successes—allow yourself to have goals even if you’re scared you can’t reach
them.
11.
Ask questions before
you make assumptions—COMMUNICATE your needs and valuable perspective
12.
“What is the big
deal? You can always paint over it with another color,”—one woman reflected
after contemplating the stress of painting her new house and reveling in the
malleability of life’s hues.
These phenomenal women inspire me
to live a more authentic life. And to end with a celebration of that fact, this
is the reading I closed group with:
Live
As long as you’re alive, why not
live? Live life to the fullest. Live it up. Live in the moment. Live as though
you had only twenty-four hours to live. Live the life you’ve always wanted.
Live for yourself—not for others, alive or dead. Live on the edge a bit; it’s
the only place from which you can take a leap. Live the life that is yours
alone. Live wherever you want, with whomever you want, however you want, but
live! Don’t just get a life—create one. Don’t just step into someone else’s
life—design your own. Don’t confuse real life with what you see on TV or at the
movies. Live free or die (even if you are not from New Hampshire). Live so that
when you’re dead, people will remark less on what you did in life—and more on
how you lived.
On that note, I shall depart from
the inter-web in an effort to live by these lists of 12.
Chameleon (eye)
Scientists call me the “ground
lion”
And ogle the transposing hues
Yet few zoom beyond my inward (eye),
Where colors don’t belie
With theatrics
For your
entertainment
I could be your slow motion
acrobat
My forked feet tight-rope narrow branches
I could be the camouflage ring master
Splaying fury in pointillist panther stripes
Across my pelican chin and abdomen
I could fly the dangle trapeze
With swaying gait and prehensile tail
I could clown my ancient crest with swiveling eyes
Like gun turrets and fire an extrudable tongue
For your entertainment
Yet I wait to be recognized
For the proprium in my (eye)s
Sunday, April 21, 2013
Shakey Graves
found out about this dude via the cedra sessions check him out
Friday, April 19, 2013
The Joys of Travel--Rilke
Oh, the joys of travel! To feel the excitement of sudden departure, not always knowing whither. Surely you and I are in agreement about that. How often did my life seem concentrated in that single moment of departure. To travel far, far--and that first morning's awakening under a new sky! And to find oneself in it--no, to discover more of oneself there. To experience there, too, where one has never been before, one's own continuity of being and, at the same time, to feel that something in your heart, somehow indigenous to this new land, is coming to life from the moment of your arrival. You feel your blood infused with some new intelligence, wonderously nourished by things you had no way of knowing.
Ranier Maria Rilke
Letter to a friend
February 3, 1923
Thursday, April 18, 2013
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
I Envy No One: A Sestina
Chocolate explosions mark the Gluttonous
Tummy chub. There are days dedicated to the Sloth,
Where rejuvenation is paramount. As for Wrath,
Laser points brow center at men who cross my Pride.
Boots, bags and cardies fluster the Greedy
Monster. Subtle as steam, my steeping Lust.
The lewd minx effuses Lust.
What ravenous serpent couldn’t resist sed Gluttonous
Indulgence. My she was Greedy,
Feigning the frigid Sloth.
This caught your eye, hooked your Pride
Unleashed my Wrath.
The smoldering, bubbling, molten Wrath,
Erogenous, as Freud’s ID. Lust,
For your mother, your brother, your friend’s Pride.
Never dishonored, always placated. As a flag, Gluttonous
In its ability to morph from Sloth
To silk. Oh, Greedy
Commodity. Society defined by Greedy
Commodity. Corkskrew and Wrath
Acknowledges emptiness in things. A Sloth
Needs but munch and snooze. Our Lust
For glitz oozes bloody glitter. We’ve become so Gluttonous
As to thirst for that scorching sap. Blind as our Pride,
Would permit. That unremitting Pride
Undergirds all conscious thought. Slop, knee-deep and
Greedy,
Hungry, thirsty, horny, Gluttonous,
Insatiable desire. Energy can never be destroyed by Wrath
Nor converted by Lust.
Only repressed, sublimated by Sloth.
You are the Sloth.
Your Pride
Will be your demise. Never let Lust
Conquer love. Lest you feed that Greedy
Monster. And ignite it’s Wrath.
You are at heart, Gluttonous.
As am I. I Lust to Sloth
In Gluttonous Stupor. My Pride
And Greedy Wrath will Envy
no one.
Vibes for the Practice
What I jammed out to during my primary series today--'flow' by venstsang and 'power yoga' by callierose on 8tracks
http://8tracks.com/venustsang/flow
Power Yoga from callirosee on 8tracks Radio.
Labels:
8tracks,
ashtanga,
chillwave,
electronic,
music,
primary series,
smoke,
yoga
Adjust My Sails
Sometimes it is so difficult for me to be grateful for the space I inhabit in the moment. If it's not school today it's work tomorrow--why do we always need a scapegoat for the discontent?
I only have 5 weeks left of college. That statement incites terror and elation in one deep breath. The closer I get to the end, the more menial the tasks seem. I am itching for the future--the unremitting gaze towards a place beyond the present could be the source of much angst.
I must learn to bask in gratitude for the tasks at hand because what lies ahead will come with a-whole-nother goodie bag of challenges. The reality is we have to do things we don’t want to in life.
We have to fight apathy every day when all we want to do is play. Yet it is about flourishing in both acts--finding the way to make your rock your thing, like Sisyphus.
Merely by a shift of cognition can we somersault the negative resistance. Right now my studies feel like a current I arduously paddle against, if merely I adjust my sails I can gain some mileage from this peculiar vessel we call ‘higher education.’
I still have so much to learn, I must practice patience--life's greatest lesson. Everything has a lesson, a purpose. Don’t rush it. Time is not as we see time, not in minutes lived but in lessons learned. I must rejoice in the lesson for today.
Labels:
apathy,
challenges,
cognition,
college,
lessons,
life,
prose,
psycholgoy,
reflection,
school,
time
The Story of Stuff & a commentary on Deep Ecology
In the spirit of upcoming Earth Day, watch this short, informative video. Either we ditch capitalism or we ditch the environment....enjoy
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Our definition of ‘the
good life’ is reflected in policy, behavior, and social norms; and
rhetoric defining ‘the good’ has
always been a moral inquiry. One of the things that struck me most from
reading about Deep Ecology was the synthesis of metaphysical and environmental
discourse.
We
cannot begin to reshift our understanding of nature until we understand
ourselves. I appreciate Deep Ecology's emphasis on the interrelationship
between the moral/spiritual realm and our overt behaviors towards each other
and the environment. As quoted by Devall and Sessions, "spiritual growth,
or unfolding, begins when we cease to understand or see ourselves as isolated
and narrow competing egos and begin to identify with other humans from our
family and friends to, eventually, our species,”
(Devall & Sessions 435).
Expanding
the realm of injustice to include the whole biotic community is a huge move.
Doing this opens the space to address how the maltreatment of each other stems
from our relationship with the environment. A good friend of mine always posited that we treat mother
nature in the same way we treat our women--we abuse, manipulate, objectify,
compartmentalize, and find value only in superficial beauty. I think this idea
is eloquent because it illustrates an axiom of deep ecology: that our social
norms with regards to other humans reflects our norms with all other beings.
What
we do to nature we inevitably do to ourselves. With the homogenization and loss
of biodiversity, we are also promoting a monoculture society, in which everyone
has the same gadget, hair-do, and Prius. Sometimes it seems like corporations
are even trying to commidify
environmentalism into an industry of 'green-cool.' Not to say that the
incorporation of sustainable ideas into the capitalist market isn't a huge step
forward, but the promotion of ecology in this sense perpetuates a broken
system.
Our
system is broken because it functions around the golden arrow of consumption.
We have become a nation of consumers—this is our identity. Our value is
measured and demonstrated by how much we consume. Because of the prime placed
on novelty, almost 99% of the stuff we produce is out of vogue within the next
year. We have converted the buying and use of goods into our new religious
practices and seek to solace the deep existential angst by consuming more
goods.
Bringing
it back to the quote mentioned above, our society defines the self in narrow
terms—by virtue of the things we are consuming and whether or not
those THINGS are the newest, best, shiniest, fastest, most popular things. And
we are addicted because we are trained like rats in skinners box. We have been
trained that always wanting more ‘things,’ is
the moral good, because it is good for a productive economy.
And
we wonder why our nation is the fattest, saddest, sickest, most addicted,
anxious, and violent on the planet—because our society aims at an
illusory moral good. Just think of how our culture could be transformed if we
defined ‘the goodlife’ in terms of spiritual satisfaction
as opposed to a mass accumulation of material goods.
I
think what Deep Ecologists were trying to get at was that an economy which
functions under the basic assumption of unlimited resources, aka capitalism,
cannot only flourish for so long on a finite planet. While I can understand how
people would see Deep Ecology as too radical, I appreciate the attention they
call to systemic injustices and the call for aggravated action against top-down
injustice. At this point what we need is a radical paradigm shift.
References
Devall, B. & Sessions, G. Principles of Deep Ecology--from Worldviews, Religion, and the Environment. (2003). Thomson & Wadsworth.
Naess, A. Ecology: The Shallow & the Deep. chapter from Green Critique.
Tuesday, April 16, 2013
Miss Representation & Tough Guise: A Reflection
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The
films, Miss Representation (2011), and Tough Guise (1999), commentate
on dysfunctional representations of masculinity and femininity in mainstream
media and culture. While Miss
Representation focuses primarily on the objectification of women in
pop-culture, Tough Guise explores the
reverberations of perfunctory messages defining masculinity.
Jennifer Newsom in Miss Representation (2011), describes
how from a very young age women learn what is desirable and internalize these
ideals. Women are conditioned to please,
and not cause drama; they are expected to embody multitudinous yet incongruous
social roles. Women should be the perfect mom, victoria’s secret model,
career-go-getter, and house-wife, all in one.
My sisters, myself, and many of my friends have
struggled with eating disorders; many women in my family and friend-circles
have struggled with substance abuse and self-harm; my sisters, my friends and
myself have all been subject to sexual discrimination, harassment, or assault.
As is described in both films, this is not unusual. One doesn’t have to look
very far for confirmation; these are some statistics from anti-violence
organizations RAINN and Futures Without Violence, “every 2 minutes, someone in
the United States is sexually assaulted; 1 in 3 women will be a victim of rape
in her lifetime; 1 in 4 women will experience intimate partner violence in her
lifetime,” among other dire facts.
The plight of women’s struggles, although
extremely relevant, is practically old hat. So I appreciate how Tough Guise (Jhally, 1999) brings to light
the social pandemic affecting young boys and men as well. Katz, a writer for Tough Guise, illustrates how current
conceptualizations of femininity and masculinity feed each other. For example,
the waif-trend is a symbolic call for women to ‘take up less space,’ in a world
where they are asserting equality and how men’s violence against women could be
viewed as a backlash to their perception of constrained masculinity. Yet Katz
(1999) argues, “there’s nothing inherent about masculinity [and femininity];
its about playing a role defined by larger social structures.” We live in a
society where masculinity is equated with violence and femininity is equated
with sexual objectification—no wonder rape is pervasive.
Walk into any bar, gym, or house-party, and you
can pinpoint countless men, if not the majority, putting on their ‘guise.’ It
is with great empathy that I have been enlightened to the intense societal
pressures unremittingly exerted on men. While it would not be audacious for a
woman to stand up against sexual discrimination or vouch for curves, men aren’t
given permission by society to emotionally explore the effects of pernicious
gender messages on their psyche.
It could be argued that women have gotten better at distancing
themselves from harmful media messages. Personally, I have come to a place
where I can watch E! News and eat Annie’s Mac’Ncheese at the same time, because
I recognize that the media is selling an image for a profit. Through
consciousness, I have created a space for glorifying the perfectly imperfect.
Katz
and Newsom identify some cogs behind the wheels of structural violence:
patriarchy and capitalism. Patriarchy, as defined by Sommers-Flanagan (2012), is
the ideology in which attributes associated with masculinity, such as power,
control, dominance are privileged and those associated with femininity,
emotiveness, compassion, empathy, care, equality, are devalued (p. 340). White
patriarchy has been the automatic gear for the United States since its
inception. Men, particularly white men, dominate the spheres of cultural
influence: politics, corporate enterprise, entertainment and media industries.
As is described in Miss Representation (2011), it’s
all about capitalism. Corporations are only concerned with the bottom line and
if they make a profit out of hyper-masculinity, sexual deviance, and voyeurism,
this is what they will promote. Corporate impunity is bought via political
campaigns; democratic checks on media are usurped to maintain the status quo.
And so long as men dictate policy, scripts, and advertisement, malignant
cultural norms persist. It is not individual men and women who are flawed,
although it is important to recognize the potential for change on an
interpersonal level— it is the atrocious cultural definitions of gender that we
enact, conceived by the media.
Katz (1999) alludes to how change has to be
two-fold- on an interpersonal level and from the top-down. We, as young
individuals, have to be courageous by challenging social norms and instigating
dialogue. Consciousness is the first step. In recognizing how the messages from
mainstream media dictate our self-concepts in relation to society, we can
choose to call out these deleterious scripts and rewrite the dialogue.
Conceptions of masculinity and femininity are not written in our DNA—these are
learned worldviews.
There definitely seems to be a gap in dialogue
between the sexes. Women are always talking about men, and men (I think?) are
talking about women, yet there is hardly any crossover. We are left in gendered
wonderland where both sexes are speculating about the others’ motives or mental
status. I think the first step in creating a space for empathy is to lift the
taboo of ‘men are from Mars, women are from Venus.’ The fact is, either way
both sexes are vilified by damaging societal messages and exploring that common
ground of oppression could be an impetus for change.
The good news is that culture is malleable, as is
socialization. Our society has already made so many great leaps forward: gay
marriage was legalized in two states and was up for vote in even more; the
Violence Against Women Act (V.A.W.A.) was revamped just this past week to
include language about the protection of minorities (Bendery, 2013). Individually,
we should advocate for healthier conceptualizations of gender, but
simultaneously, we have a duty to make our sentiments known to the top-tiers of
power. Gender may always be a point of contention, but the discourse is not
deterministic.
References
Bendery, J. (2013, Feb. 22). VAWA 2013: House GOP Unveils Bill With
No LGBT Protections, Modified Tribal Provision. The Huffington Post, retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/22/vawa-2013_n_2742096.html
Jhally, S. (Director), & Katz, J. (Writer). (1999). Tough Guise: Violence, Media, & the
Crisis in Masculinity. Media Education Fountdation.
Futures Without Violence. The Faces on Domestic, Dating, and Sexual
Violence. Retrieved from http://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/content/action_center/detail/754,
Newsom, J. (Director). (2011). Miss
Representation. Girls’ Club Entertainment.
RAINN: Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network. Statistics.
Retrieved from http://www.rainn.org/statistics
Sommers-Flanagan, J. & Sommers-Flanagan, R. (2012). Counseling and Psychotherapy Theories in
Context and Practice (2nd Ed.). New York, NY: John Wiley &
Sons.
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