Miss Representation & Tough Guise: A Reflection

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          The films, Miss Representation (2011), and Tough Guise (1999), commentate on dysfunctional representations of masculinity and femininity in mainstream media and culture. While Miss Representation focuses primarily on the objectification of women in pop-culture, Tough Guise explores the reverberations of perfunctory messages defining masculinity. 

Jennifer Newsom in Miss Representation (2011), describes how from a very young age women learn what is desirable and internalize these ideals. Women are conditioned to please, and not cause drama; they are expected to embody multitudinous yet incongruous social roles. Women should be the perfect mom, victoria’s secret model, career-go-getter, and house-wife, all in one.

My sisters, myself, and many of my friends have struggled with eating disorders; many women in my family and friend-circles have struggled with substance abuse and self-harm; my sisters, my friends and myself have all been subject to sexual discrimination, harassment, or assault. As is described in both films, this is not unusual. One doesn’t have to look very far for confirmation; these are some statistics from anti-violence organizations RAINN and Futures Without Violence, “every 2 minutes, someone in the United States is sexually assaulted; 1 in 3 women will be a victim of rape in her lifetime; 1 in 4 women will experience intimate partner violence in her lifetime,” among other dire facts.  

The plight of women’s struggles, although extremely relevant, is practically old hat. So I appreciate how Tough Guise (Jhally, 1999) brings to light the social pandemic affecting young boys and men as well. Katz, a writer for Tough Guise, illustrates how current conceptualizations of femininity and masculinity feed each other. For example, the waif-trend is a symbolic call for women to ‘take up less space,’ in a world where they are asserting equality and how men’s violence against women could be viewed as a backlash to their perception of constrained masculinity. Yet Katz (1999) argues, “there’s nothing inherent about masculinity [and femininity]; its about playing a role defined by larger social structures.” We live in a society where masculinity is equated with violence and femininity is equated with sexual objectification—no wonder rape is pervasive.

Walk into any bar, gym, or house-party, and you can pinpoint countless men, if not the majority, putting on their ‘guise.’ It is with great empathy that I have been enlightened to the intense societal pressures unremittingly exerted on men. While it would not be audacious for a woman to stand up against sexual discrimination or vouch for curves, men aren’t given permission by society to emotionally explore the effects of pernicious gender messages on their psyche.  It could be argued that women have gotten better at distancing themselves from harmful media messages. Personally, I have come to a place where I can watch E! News and eat Annie’s Mac’Ncheese at the same time, because I recognize that the media is selling an image for a profit. Through consciousness, I have created a space for glorifying the perfectly imperfect.

            Katz and Newsom identify some cogs behind the wheels of structural violence: patriarchy and capitalism. Patriarchy, as defined by Sommers-Flanagan (2012), is the ideology in which attributes associated with masculinity, such as power, control, dominance are privileged and those associated with femininity, emotiveness, compassion, empathy, care, equality, are devalued (p. 340). White patriarchy has been the automatic gear for the United States since its inception. Men, particularly white men, dominate the spheres of cultural influence: politics, corporate enterprise, entertainment and media industries.

As is described in Miss Representation (2011), it’s all about capitalism. Corporations are only concerned with the bottom line and if they make a profit out of hyper-masculinity, sexual deviance, and voyeurism, this is what they will promote. Corporate impunity is bought via political campaigns; democratic checks on media are usurped to maintain the status quo. And so long as men dictate policy, scripts, and advertisement, malignant cultural norms persist. It is not individual men and women who are flawed, although it is important to recognize the potential for change on an interpersonal level— it is the atrocious cultural definitions of gender that we enact, conceived by the media.

Katz (1999) alludes to how change has to be two-fold- on an interpersonal level and from the top-down. We, as young individuals, have to be courageous by challenging social norms and instigating dialogue. Consciousness is the first step. In recognizing how the messages from mainstream media dictate our self-concepts in relation to society, we can choose to call out these deleterious scripts and rewrite the dialogue. Conceptions of masculinity and femininity are not written in our DNA—these are learned worldviews.

There definitely seems to be a gap in dialogue between the sexes. Women are always talking about men, and men (I think?) are talking about women, yet there is hardly any crossover. We are left in gendered wonderland where both sexes are speculating about the others’ motives or mental status. I think the first step in creating a space for empathy is to lift the taboo of ‘men are from Mars, women are from Venus.’ The fact is, either way both sexes are vilified by damaging societal messages and exploring that common ground of oppression could be an impetus for change. 

The good news is that culture is malleable, as is socialization. Our society has already made so many great leaps forward: gay marriage was legalized in two states and was up for vote in even more; the Violence Against Women Act (V.A.W.A.) was revamped just this past week to include language about the protection of minorities (Bendery, 2013). Individually, we should advocate for healthier conceptualizations of gender, but simultaneously, we have a duty to make our sentiments known to the top-tiers of power. Gender may always be a point of contention, but the discourse is not deterministic.

References

Bendery, J. (2013, Feb. 22). VAWA 2013: House GOP Unveils Bill With No LGBT Protections, Modified Tribal Provision. The Huffington Post, retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/02/22/vawa-2013_n_2742096.html

Jhally, S. (Director), & Katz, J. (Writer). (1999). Tough Guise: Violence, Media, & the Crisis in Masculinity. Media Education Fountdation.

Futures Without Violence. The Faces on Domestic, Dating, and Sexual Violence. Retrieved from http://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/content/action_center/detail/754,

Newsom, J. (Director). (2011). Miss Representation. Girls’ Club Entertainment.

RAINN: Rape, Abuse, & Incest National Network. Statistics. Retrieved from http://www.rainn.org/statistics

Sommers-Flanagan, J. & Sommers-Flanagan, R. (2012). Counseling and Psychotherapy Theories in Context and Practice (2^nd Ed.). New York, NY: John Wiley & Sons.

Venus of Urbino

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This lil’ piggy hears the corporate chime,

Dyes violet blonde and whines.

Feeling buffalo blah? This liquid gold

Turns wonder inside out. It’s the secret

Of glam-vicious—sparked by ignoble dukes

Who reign supernovae, where stars come

To die. So, rock, paper, screw you!

I am Woman, of swollen root and form.

Oh my Guinness, cuckoos an un-

Conventional daphne.  It’s the blind,

Leading the blind, an atom bomb

In my ovaries. Where stars come

To die. In alabaster tombs, votives cry

Where is Venus in the ‘I’

Hashtag empires buzz,

Vendi, Vidi, Vici—

 

sex, psyche, & women

      

           Often times, when contemplating life’s many dynamic tracts, I will sit on my tiny apartment roof, smoking cigarettes, drinking a beverage (tea, 4loco? Who knows what kind of mood I’m in), watching college hooligans play golf on the course parallel to my building, perhaps reading a bit of Game of Thrones here and there, just for inspiration. Today one of my dearest single comrades joined in the vinostorm (its like a brain storm, but with vino). She was chastising me today for not having enough casual sex, “we need to get you laid,” she so sassily commented, malbec in one hand, Turkish royal in another. 

            This made me wonder, “why is it that I coach you on dating and you coach me on promiscuity? I just don’t get the point, it seems exhausting.”

            She waves her hand, “girl, (what women say when we really want to get serious) the fucking point is that sex is awesome.”

            “Yes thank you I am aware, but it’s like I don’t want to engage in a behavior that I know will end up fucking with my head. I know it will never be fulfilling to just ‘get fucked’ so therefore I don’t do it. How do you do it?”

            She raises her eyebrows, “I just give zero fucks,” pauses for a drag, “that’s the key to casual relations.” We both sip our stem-less glasses and watch some failed golf-swings.

            “I call bull-shit. You give so many fucks. You just repress them and one day you will have to fish out all that hurt, shame and blame when you finally find out you can’t open up to a man.”

            “Fuck you and your psych degree,” she smirks, “whatever I still think we should get you laid this weekend.”

            Why is it that sex grapples women’s psyches so? If I were to think of one thing that all women struggle with (what besides body image, blackheads, and that damn $8 nailpolish that only lasts 5 days. Yes, I use a top-coat) it would be sexual relationships. Let’s explore.

            First off, let me ardently refute a ubiquitous myth about sex: the idea that men are devoid of insecurities and emotions surrounding sex. Men give the same kinds of fucks we do, just in different flavors and magnitudes. I think men just connect to sex in such a primal way, they’re minds don’t fuck up the experience by over-thinking every little detail or scenario.

            I think this is where most all of us women go wrong: we over think EVERYTHING. We are so in our heads that we misinterpret the moment. And I know it is hard, because when you get down to it, it isn’t just you and your new-found-man-sauce who is in the room; it is all of the past relations, patterns, resentments, jealousies, insecurities, you get the idea. How do we let go and just ‘be in the moment’? *sidenote: I bet Buddhists have mad awesome sex.

            Well I suppose I shall end this snid-bit like any other cliché self-discovery story, live your fucking dreams and be present with your relations. Because its like, “hey, were all fierce little monsters. If you are not being treated in your sexual relationships how you deserve, then fuck him (not literally).” Our past selves constantly talk smack about how we always screw up; our future selves spit game about who we will become; but we have total control over our current selves. When we are present we can truly recognize whether this relationship, this behavior, this thought, this emotion is conducive for our overall awesomeness. I know it sounds crazy and is truly difficult to employ, but we do have control over every thought, every emotion, every sexual encounter; these are all choices in the amalgamation of choices that make up your unique phenomenal self. My eldest sister would always tell us youngins to, “make good choices!” and I guess this is truly the soundest advice one could offer.