A deep peace has settled over me. Such that I feel I am ready for whatever the future holds and that everything is as it should be. I forgot my most-beloved camera in my car, perhaps out of soul necessity. Often times I am so consumed with capturing the moment, its essence is not reveled in.
I can't hold space and time and people and experience. Not with my pictures, not with my mind. And what are pictures anyway but a holding onto the past--and also a judging of the present. A abstraction from the real world and also, real experience. Is it possible that sometimes our most prized possessions, the ones we feel define us in a certain way, are in fact more a source of anxiety than content?
Perhaps it is a cleansing of 'the other eye', in that everything I see, hear, feel, and smell will be for me and me alone. A journey deep into myself to cultivate that glowing love out of recognition with hardship, with the calls of the void.
It is funny, the things we pack and things left behind. So often we don't take a moment for emotional inventory--cargo is revealed after the fervor of newness wears off. In these moments, when you are stripped of every comfort, every knowable outlet, vehicles for assuaging the 'great loneliness,' the true self emerges.
One must listen to all of the voices, engage their nascence as well as their purpose. The good and the bad are all part of the great divine--balancing forces who seek recognition, but are so often stuffed with frivolous hegemonic tides.
And so this is my challenge, to engage with each voice, each urge and discontent, until they are validated and incorporated into my whole being. I have been fragmented by the forces of my society and i must recover the pieces with patience, struggle, and love in the face of the unknown.
photos courtesy of Mitch Hockett-- flowers of the Himalaya
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